Tag: Violence Against Women

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Thoughts on violence against women in Singapore vs. Norway

by Catharina Borchgrevink, Change Maker

 Violence against women is very much a global problem. Although this particular We Can! campaign focuses on women in Singapore, this issue relates to women all over the world. Some issues are more relevant to Singapore as a society, but at the core we find the same harmful gender stereotypes everywhere, crossing national borders.

I am a Norwegian who recently relocated to Singapore. Norway and the other Scandinavian countries are by no means perfect societies for women. There is definitely room for improvement when it comes to workplace discrimination, sexist attitudes and behaviour, violence against women and gender stereotypes. However, gender parity in these countries is more in place on a global scale.

Many foreigners, including myself, are mostly unaware of the state of women’s rights in Singapore. On the surface, Singapore is clean, safe, and women have equal rights to education and healthcare. A closer look shows the cracks: lack of paternity leave, inequalities in the distribution of leadership positions, no benefits for single mothers and perhaps most shocking of all, the non-criminalisation of marital rape.

The latest statistics show that 1 in 10 women in Singapore will experience physical abuse by a man during their lifetime, and 6 in 10 of these women will suffer repeated abuse. These figures are not unique to Singapore. The UN states that 1 in 3 women worldwide will suffer from abuse. In Norway, it’s 1 in 10 women. Even in the most “gender equal” of societies, women are at risk, especially in their own homes. Most rapes and assaults do not take place in scary alleys and parks, they occur at home, by someone familiar or known to the victim.

One particular issue that needs to be addressed for Singapore is that marital rape is not recognised as a crime. Although rape is punishable up to 20 years, marital rape is an exception of this ruling. It should not matter what relationship the woman has to the perpetrator – after all, rape is still rape, and for many women the fact that the person committing the crime is someone they should be able to trust greatly compounds the severity of the crime. In Norway, the penal code does not make an exception for rape that occurs within a marriage or partnership—it is punishable up to 10 years in prison. However, receiving maximum penalty is rare, and even in Norway cases are often dismissed on the grounds of a lack of evidence. Underreporting is a problem both in Singapore and in Norway, and for many women, it is feelings of shame that stops them from reporting the rape. Where do these feelings come from?

Ingrained feelings of shame after a rape are common worldwide, including in Norway. One big difference however is that these feelings stem from the victim’s own emotions, and not the family of the victim. Cultural norms of keeping up appearances for the family, and family reputation, are much more common in Singapore and Asia than in Scandinavia. Upon reporting or coming out as a victim of sexual assault, the reaction from the victim’s family should be supportive and helpful, not insinuating shame or covering up the crime, which sadly often happens when families are concerned with keeping one’s reputation.

Personally, this culture of familial shame and victim-blaming is unfamiliar, and unexpected of Singapore as a society which, on the surface, appears to be progressive in terms of gender parity. While I can relate to family reputation being important, being willing to hide a crime is quite uncommon in Norway.

Having said that, even in Norway, the tendency to blame the victim still exists. People raise questions on what the woman was wearing or if she was drunk, showing that even across cultures, violence against women is indeed a global problem.

The root causes of violence against women have to be viewed from a global perspective, as it is not contained to a Singaporean or Asian context. Cultural norms of shame and victim blaming are more complicated issues to tackle, but we should not be afraid of stepping up and speaking out against these challenges. You, too, can make a difference in your own community—start a discussion of how Singapore can become a safer place for women today!

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This is your life. Get tested.

The way that we talk to those around us about HIV, marriage and sex can put women’s health at risk.

This insight lies behind ‘This is your life. Get tested.’, a new video released today by the We Can! campaign to mark World Health Day. The video depicts a woman sitting at a doctor’s office, trying to decide whether to take an HIV test, as she believes her husband has been having sex with other women. As she waits for the doctor, memories of encounters with various figures in her life flash in front of her. These include her husband coercing her to have sex without protection despite her wishes, and her family and friends expressing scepticism and disbelief at her situation, or blaming her for it.

“This video illustrates how societal support for women’s sexual empowerment within marriage can be crucial to women’s health and well-being”, said Kokila Annamalai, the We Can! Campaign Coordinator. “Research on women who report contracting HIV from their husbands shows that sexual disempowerment plays a key role in their experience. As a society we must affirm women’s right to say no to sex, or to insist on a condom within marriage. We also want to encourage all women who think they may be at risk of STIs (sexually transmitted infections) to get tested”.

The video has been crafted based on a five-year qualitative study commissioned by the Association of Women for Action and Research (AWARE). The study was led by a team from the Saw Swee Hock School of Public Health, National University of Singapore, and supported by the Department of STI Control, National Skin Centre and the Communicable Disease Centre.

Through in-depth interviews with 60 women, the study shows that among respondents who were married and diagnosed with HIV/AIDS, more than half reported that their husbands had infected them. Many of them knew that their husbands were having sexual relations outside of the marriage, but felt disempowered to protect themselves from STIs by refusing sex or ensuring the use of condoms. This may be attributed to unequal power relations between husband and wife, as well as traditional gender norms expecting women to be sexually submissive to their husbands. This is reflected in some of the women’s reports that their husbands became violent when asked to use a condom. As a result, some women have been forcibly infected by HIV/AIDS through marital rape. Yet the Penal Code (Section 375(4)) continues to put women’s health at risk by giving immunity to husbands who rape their wives.

The study also found that HIV-infected women’s difficulties were compounded by stigmatisation by unsympathetic family, friends, workplaces and community. This deters some women who are at risk from getting tested and seeking support. The video aims to raise awareness of the importance of women prioritising their own health and lives, even if friends and family are less than supportive.

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Victim-blaming in the media

by Ian Mak, Change Maker

We all know how the media can shape people’s ideas and perceptions. But I never really cared—perhaps, I was jaded by the avalanche of media that bombards us nowadays.

I first came across the term ‘victim-blaming’ while first working for the We Can! campaign. It refers to how victims, especially those of sexual assault, are held responsible for others’ attacks on them. Society often adopts such attitudes towards rape and sexual assault in particular, and many assume that being assaulted is, in some part, the fault of the victim.

To me, intuitively, the thought of victim-blaming was simply absurd. It is like kicking someone when they’re down, and only serves to exacerbate the pain the victim must feel. I did not expect to find such an attitude in my own country.

How wrong I was. Victim-blaming doesn’t simply just exist in Singapore; it is rampant in our daily lives, creates a toxic mentality that condones crime and manufactures an atmosphere of fear.

Check out the infamous poster from the police that pushes the responsibility of not being attacked, assaulted or targeted, to the victim.

Rubbed Wrong Way

I feel that this line of advertising is extremely problematic. In the first poster, the rapist is shrouded in shadow and his face cannot be seen clearly. In contrast, the victim is placed in the spotlight. The focus is clearly shifted from the perpetrator to the victim. It is as if the victim is the only one we are asked to focus on, in a crime that they have no control over.

This isn’t an isolated incident on the Internet. The Singapore Police Force is a well-respected public institution, which arguably holds significant authority and sway over public opinion, yet it is endorsing the message that “it’s your responsibility” to avoid being attacked.

Such advertising disempowers individuals, making people fearful of their own safety, as well as feel that they are in some way, at fault for having been assaulted. Worse still, this sends the message to potential sex criminals that their behaviour is acceptable.

More worryingly, such advertising is indicative of a wider culture of victim-blaming that exists in Singapore. Often, families with conservative values would keep hush sexual crimes that happen to family members, for fear of the loss of ‘face’ that entails. Police officers have claimed that rape cannot happen unless a girl ‘opens her legs’. In the end, the victim is unable to gain support from figures that are supposed to be in positions of trust and power to them.

This is not a problem that Singapore alone faces. In 2012, the reputed US news agency CNN reported the infamous Steubenville rape case from a sympathetic stance toward the rapists involved. CNN anchor Candy Crowley claimed it was ‘incredibly difficult’ to hear the guilty verdict as the two culprits who had ‘such promising futures, star football players, literally watched as their lives fell apart’. What they failed to mention, however, was the hurt and damage caused by such a heinous crime. By focusing bizarrely on the culprit, CNN sorely detracted from the gravity of the crime and the plight of the victim.

dontbethatguyBut we also may look overseas to find a better model in tackling rape and other crimes. In contrast to our local ‘Don’t Get Rubbed the Wrong Way’ posters, campaigns overseas such as the Canadian ‘Don’t Be That Guy’ message place the focus squarely on the perpetrator, warning people to not be the culprit. By doing so, they send out the clear message that rape is never acceptable in any circumstance, and forces people to take responsibility for their actions. In contrast to local advertisements, this is empowering.

More importantly, however, each of us needs to question how we ourselves have witnessed victim-blaming and whether we have consciously or unconsciously been guilty of condoning such attitudes. We need to make a commitment to being conscious of our own attitudes and speak out if a friend or family member expresses a sentiment that may be damaging or incorrect.

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Step up to make a change at our Forum Theatre show!

DSC_7242-1024x682
Date: 25 April 2014 (Fri)
Time: 7.30pm (doors open 7pm)
Venue: Training Hub
Social Service Institute
111 Somerset Road #04-01
Singapore 238164

$5 per ticket

‘Just A Bad Day’ is a community theatre initiative which aims to raise awareness and encourage discussion on domestic, workplace and dating violence.

We have used this novel and interactive tool in schools, community centres and and family service centres to promote healthy relationships and violence-free communities.

The forum theatre format invites the audience to come up on stage and explore different strategies to improve the situation.

‘Just A Bad Day’ promises to be a stimulating encounter. Through this intimate performance, we hope to provoke thought and discussion on the less tangible forms of violence against women that continue to be a reality in Singapore.

Our first public show of the year is jointly organised by We Can! Singapore and Singapore Service Institute. You can find out more about the play here.

Click here to purchase your ticket for the event!

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Change Maker Reunion: Making waves in the community

we can logo (1)Thank you for joining us on our journey towards a gender-equal and violence-free society. You are invited to our very first Change Maker Reunion!

Date: 5 April 2014 (Saturday)
Time: 3pm-6pm
Venue: Zsofi Tapas Bar, 68 Dunlop Street, Singapore 209396

*Scrumptious tea will be provided!

Register here.

By taking the Change Maker pledge, you joined 3.9 million people around the world who are speaking up against violence in their societies.

In 2013, We Can! Singapore launched, reaching out to the Singapore community through theatre, workshops, art, media and more. With your help, we raised awareness and inspired action to reduce social tolerance of all forms of violence against women.

This year, we want to deepen that change and invite you to be part of that process.

We have big plans and exciting ideas for 2014! We want to grow the Change Maker community, mobilise youth to lead the campaign and inspire change at all levels. To do this better, we want to hear from you.

Come down on 5 April and amidst food, drinks and new friendships, share with us your ideas, experiences and hopes for change. Change Makers from different walks of life will be speaking about their stories of personal change and their experiences with community outreach. If you would like to share your story, write to us at [email protected].

We will also be honouring the Change Makers who have done exceptional work in 2013, so do come and support them!

We Can! is a community-led movement – it is your movement. You can have a say in the direction and impact the campaign creates this year. So come – lend us your voice, hands and feet.

Programme:

3-3.15pm – Registration

3.15-3.25 – Introduction

3.25-3.40pm – Icebreaker

3.40-4.10pm – Making waves in the community (discussion)

4.10-4.25pm – Outreach through social media

4.25-4.35pm – Opportunities for volunteering and activism

4.35-4.50pm – Presentation of Star Change Maker Awards

4.50-5.15pm – Sharing by Change Makers

5.15-5.30pm – Feedback and reflections

5.35-6pm – Tea and networking

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*You are eligible to attend this reunion if you’ve attended a Change Maker workshop or taken the Change Maker Pledge.

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We Can! Campaign Highlights 2013

we can logo (1)2013 marked the beginning of the We Can! End All Violence Against Women campaign in Singapore, and it was a fabulous year full of learning, adventures and change-making.

Our forum theatre, ‘Just A Bad Day‘ – put together and performed by Change Makers, using true stories from their own lives – travelled to audiences across the island, from youth at ITE colleges and *SCAPE, to communities at Tanjong Pagar Family Service Centre and Toa Payoh Community Centre. Through these interactive shows, we explored how violence isn’t always black and blue, and how each of us can play a role in putting a stop to the everyday manifestations of violence around us.

We also conducted 25 Change Maker workshops for almost 400 participants from different walks of life. At these workshops, we discuss why we as a society remain tolerant of violence against women and discover ways in which we can start to make change. The Change Maker workshop has proved to be a unique experience that shifts perspectives and encourages introspection. If you’ve come to a workshop and found it meaningful, do refer your friends to one here!

Would You Step In? Volunteer Change Makers staged a scene of a man abusing his girlfriend on Orchard Road to explore how bystanders would choose to intervene. Watch the video below!

We Can! Arts Fest on 8 December 2013 brought artists, activists and survivors together to start a dialogue about the less visible forms of violence in our society. 250 people attended, many of them taking the pledge to be Change Makers.

We look forward to making more memories with you this year, as we take the campaign forward. Thank you for being a part of the journey towards a non-violent and gender-equal society!

If you would like to explore bringing the Change Maker workshop or forum theatre to your community, write to us!

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What young people can do to stop violence against women

by Ian Mak, Change Maker

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youth change makers“The youth of today and the youth of tomorrow will be accorded an almost unequal opportunity for great accomplishment and human service.” – Dr Nicholas Murray

 

It is often tempting as a young person to discount our power to make change. We tend to ignore daunting social problems, believing that we do not have the ability to do anything about it. “Anyway,” we think, “adults can do it better.”

 

Wrong. Youth have tremendous potential and more importantly, the unique opportunity to make a significant difference in forwarding social causes. In the days of our youth is when many of our beliefs and worldviews are solidified. If we take the effort to question and rethink the social norms and practices around us, especially where they are problematic, we will be able to make a significant breakthrough in advancing social progress. This is because, through a critical enquiry of the traditions and cultural attitudes we grow up in, we discover new ways of being and doing things that can be better for social living.

 

This is particularly true in the case of violence against women. Over the years, violence against women in societies around the world hasn’t reduced – in fact, it has increased. Violence against women isn’t about a random nutter of a husband abusing his wife. It’s about outmoded concepts of masculinity. It’s about the normalisation of men using violence against women to retain and reproduce power. It’s about the silence from friends and family members who ensure that such violence goes unreported, and, therefore, excused. It is, fundamentally, about the social tolerance of women’s suffering.

 

We can do better than that. Every generation has the power to shape its own beliefs. We can do this by interrogating the past and reimagining the future. To start with, we need to examine existing social norms that allow violence against women to occur and go unreported.

 

One idea that really needs to be reconsidered is the prevailing notion of masculinity. Through redefining masculinity, we can change the attitude of men towards women and towards each other. We must know, and let other men know, that to be masculine is not to be violent and dominant over women or other men.

 

Social progress is often only made when people come together to take a stand. Think of Martin Luther King’s civil rights movement and of Gandhi’s civil disobedience against the British monopoly of the salt trade. Youth in Singapore and across the world making a commitment not to tolerate violence against women would send out a powerful message to everyone. It would tell people that society is moving forward and that we, this generation, will not excuse violence, will not accept inequality and oppression.

 

It is not going to be easy. Familial constructs across the world designate men as the head of the household, allowing for men to be considered as superior and more powerful. On the flip side, the same familial constructs prescribe that women should be submissive, subordinate, sacrificial and silent in the face of violence because it is their responsibility to keep the family together at all costs. As a result, women find it difficult to report violence, for fear of stigma and societal condemnation.

 

The youth can play a significant role in reshaping gender relations, starting with our own attitudes and the relationships in our lives. We can also act as change makers on the ground by interrupting a friend who makes a sexist joke or gently pointing out to a couple that their relationship is unequal. Most importantly, for young men, we can collectively redefine our view of masculinity as one that does not condone violence against women.

 

These actions may be small individually, but if everyone makes an effort, we can make real progress towards ending violence against women.

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We Can! Arts Fest – Where Art Meets Activism

artsThis December, We Can! Singapore is breaking the silence of violence with the We Can! Arts Fest.

Violence isn’t always black and blue. Most times, it creeps into women’s lives unexpectedly – at home, at the workplace, on the street, at a party. It leaves an impact on women, men and children.

Do you know how to spot the signs?

Walk through our interactive installation on psychological abuse, stop to have coffee with a social activist, watch a play on true stories of violence from Singapore, and discover how you can make a difference.

On 8 December 2013, meet others who are using their voices to speak up against violence. Together, we can create awareness and action for a violence-free society.

Artists, activists and survivors are coming together in an exciting lineup to interrogate the different forms of violence around us that go unnoticed because of our silence.

Event details:
Theme: The Silence of Violence
Date: 8 December 2013
Time: 11am – 10pm
Venue: Aliwal Arts Centre, 28 Aliwal Street

Art + film + music + plays + poetry + workshops + more!

Get your tickets ($5) now!

Click HERE for more information on the programme.

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Call out for volunteer voice actors

The We Can! campaign is taking to social media to raise awareness and spark action against gender violence during the international 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence.

Starting on 25 November (the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women) and ending on 10 December (Human Rights Day), 16 Days of Activism hopes to raise awareness about gender-based violence as a human rights issue.

The We Can! campaign is participating by running an interactive social media campaign to bring attention to gender violence in Singapore and encourage ordinary people to take action.

We need your help. We need voice actors to record a few audio scenes for the campaign.

The sound recording will only take 1.5 to 2 hours of your time, sometime in October. We ask people of all ages, genders, and ethnicities to participate – those who can speak multiple languages are especially welcome.

If you are interested, please complete this form by Friday, 4 October.

Thank you for your help, we really look forward to hearing from you!

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Trekking across Jordan for a good cause

Twelve women from non-profit ‘Women on a Mission’ will soon be on their way to the deserts of Jordan to raise awareness and funds for survivors of human trafficking and rape.

Women on a Mission, an official ally of the We Can! campaign, combines challenging expeditions with marketing campaigns and events to raise awareness and funds for a humanitarian cause by partnering with existing non-profit organisations around the world.

Last year, Women on a Mission raised $145,000 for victims of war through their campaign to the Everest Base Camp. This year the team hopes to raise $100,000 to support three non-profits: AWARE, UN Women, and Women for Women International.

The campaign will be kick off on 18 October with a fundraising event at The Polo Club of Singapore, featuring international adventurer and TED speaker Thaddeus Lawrence, a fashion show by Jordanian designer Asma Charles, and a special dance performance by The Jewelz. Details about the event are below. All funds will be donated to women victims of violence and war.

Event: 1001 Nights Under the Stars
Date: 18 October, Friday
Time: 7:00-10:00pm
Venue: Singapore Polo Club, 80 Mt. Pleasant Road
Ticket: $165
Please click here to support this campaign.

The team of 12 women from Singapore and Europe will embark on a 10-day trek on 3 November. A few spots are still open for the hike, so if you’re interested in joining the expedition, please contact [email protected].

By trekking in the Middle East, the team hopes to bring international attention to the need for societies, governments and corporations to get involved and help end violence against women, not just victims of war, but also victims of human trafficking and rape. Preparing for the trek they hope will change the lives of many, the team expresses their passion for the cause. “This reality can no longer be tolerated, in any form, in any context, and by anyone around the globe”.