Author: admin

Categories
Blog

This is your life. Get tested.

The way that we talk to those around us about HIV, marriage and sex can put women’s health at risk.

This insight lies behind ‘This is your life. Get tested.’, a new video released today by the We Can! campaign to mark World Health Day. The video depicts a woman sitting at a doctor’s office, trying to decide whether to take an HIV test, as she believes her husband has been having sex with other women. As she waits for the doctor, memories of encounters with various figures in her life flash in front of her. These include her husband coercing her to have sex without protection despite her wishes, and her family and friends expressing scepticism and disbelief at her situation, or blaming her for it.

“This video illustrates how societal support for women’s sexual empowerment within marriage can be crucial to women’s health and well-being”, said Kokila Annamalai, the We Can! Campaign Coordinator. “Research on women who report contracting HIV from their husbands shows that sexual disempowerment plays a key role in their experience. As a society we must affirm women’s right to say no to sex, or to insist on a condom within marriage. We also want to encourage all women who think they may be at risk of STIs (sexually transmitted infections) to get tested”.

The video has been crafted based on a five-year qualitative study commissioned by the Association of Women for Action and Research (AWARE). The study was led by a team from the Saw Swee Hock School of Public Health, National University of Singapore, and supported by the Department of STI Control, National Skin Centre and the Communicable Disease Centre.

Through in-depth interviews with 60 women, the study shows that among respondents who were married and diagnosed with HIV/AIDS, more than half reported that their husbands had infected them. Many of them knew that their husbands were having sexual relations outside of the marriage, but felt disempowered to protect themselves from STIs by refusing sex or ensuring the use of condoms. This may be attributed to unequal power relations between husband and wife, as well as traditional gender norms expecting women to be sexually submissive to their husbands. This is reflected in some of the women’s reports that their husbands became violent when asked to use a condom. As a result, some women have been forcibly infected by HIV/AIDS through marital rape. Yet the Penal Code (Section 375(4)) continues to put women’s health at risk by giving immunity to husbands who rape their wives.

The study also found that HIV-infected women’s difficulties were compounded by stigmatisation by unsympathetic family, friends, workplaces and community. This deters some women who are at risk from getting tested and seeking support. The video aims to raise awareness of the importance of women prioritising their own health and lives, even if friends and family are less than supportive.

Categories
Blog

Victim-blaming in the media

by Ian Mak, Change Maker

We all know how the media can shape people’s ideas and perceptions. But I never really cared—perhaps, I was jaded by the avalanche of media that bombards us nowadays.

I first came across the term ‘victim-blaming’ while first working for the We Can! campaign. It refers to how victims, especially those of sexual assault, are held responsible for others’ attacks on them. Society often adopts such attitudes towards rape and sexual assault in particular, and many assume that being assaulted is, in some part, the fault of the victim.

To me, intuitively, the thought of victim-blaming was simply absurd. It is like kicking someone when they’re down, and only serves to exacerbate the pain the victim must feel. I did not expect to find such an attitude in my own country.

How wrong I was. Victim-blaming doesn’t simply just exist in Singapore; it is rampant in our daily lives, creates a toxic mentality that condones crime and manufactures an atmosphere of fear.

Check out the infamous poster from the police that pushes the responsibility of not being attacked, assaulted or targeted, to the victim.

Rubbed Wrong Way

I feel that this line of advertising is extremely problematic. In the first poster, the rapist is shrouded in shadow and his face cannot be seen clearly. In contrast, the victim is placed in the spotlight. The focus is clearly shifted from the perpetrator to the victim. It is as if the victim is the only one we are asked to focus on, in a crime that they have no control over.

This isn’t an isolated incident on the Internet. The Singapore Police Force is a well-respected public institution, which arguably holds significant authority and sway over public opinion, yet it is endorsing the message that “it’s your responsibility” to avoid being attacked.

Such advertising disempowers individuals, making people fearful of their own safety, as well as feel that they are in some way, at fault for having been assaulted. Worse still, this sends the message to potential sex criminals that their behaviour is acceptable.

More worryingly, such advertising is indicative of a wider culture of victim-blaming that exists in Singapore. Often, families with conservative values would keep hush sexual crimes that happen to family members, for fear of the loss of ‘face’ that entails. Police officers have claimed that rape cannot happen unless a girl ‘opens her legs’. In the end, the victim is unable to gain support from figures that are supposed to be in positions of trust and power to them.

This is not a problem that Singapore alone faces. In 2012, the reputed US news agency CNN reported the infamous Steubenville rape case from a sympathetic stance toward the rapists involved. CNN anchor Candy Crowley claimed it was ‘incredibly difficult’ to hear the guilty verdict as the two culprits who had ‘such promising futures, star football players, literally watched as their lives fell apart’. What they failed to mention, however, was the hurt and damage caused by such a heinous crime. By focusing bizarrely on the culprit, CNN sorely detracted from the gravity of the crime and the plight of the victim.

dontbethatguyBut we also may look overseas to find a better model in tackling rape and other crimes. In contrast to our local ‘Don’t Get Rubbed the Wrong Way’ posters, campaigns overseas such as the Canadian ‘Don’t Be That Guy’ message place the focus squarely on the perpetrator, warning people to not be the culprit. By doing so, they send out the clear message that rape is never acceptable in any circumstance, and forces people to take responsibility for their actions. In contrast to local advertisements, this is empowering.

More importantly, however, each of us needs to question how we ourselves have witnessed victim-blaming and whether we have consciously or unconsciously been guilty of condoning such attitudes. We need to make a commitment to being conscious of our own attitudes and speak out if a friend or family member expresses a sentiment that may be damaging or incorrect.

Categories
News & Updates

Step up to make a change at our Forum Theatre show!

DSC_7242-1024x682
Date: 25 April 2014 (Fri)
Time: 7.30pm (doors open 7pm)
Venue: Training Hub
Social Service Institute
111 Somerset Road #04-01
Singapore 238164

$5 per ticket

‘Just A Bad Day’ is a community theatre initiative which aims to raise awareness and encourage discussion on domestic, workplace and dating violence.

We have used this novel and interactive tool in schools, community centres and and family service centres to promote healthy relationships and violence-free communities.

The forum theatre format invites the audience to come up on stage and explore different strategies to improve the situation.

‘Just A Bad Day’ promises to be a stimulating encounter. Through this intimate performance, we hope to provoke thought and discussion on the less tangible forms of violence against women that continue to be a reality in Singapore.

Our first public show of the year is jointly organised by We Can! Singapore and Singapore Service Institute. You can find out more about the play here.

Click here to purchase your ticket for the event!

Categories
Blog

Change Maker Reunion: Making waves in the community

we can logo (1)Thank you for joining us on our journey towards a gender-equal and violence-free society. You are invited to our very first Change Maker Reunion!

Date: 5 April 2014 (Saturday)
Time: 3pm-6pm
Venue: Zsofi Tapas Bar, 68 Dunlop Street, Singapore 209396

*Scrumptious tea will be provided!

Register here.

By taking the Change Maker pledge, you joined 3.9 million people around the world who are speaking up against violence in their societies.

In 2013, We Can! Singapore launched, reaching out to the Singapore community through theatre, workshops, art, media and more. With your help, we raised awareness and inspired action to reduce social tolerance of all forms of violence against women.

This year, we want to deepen that change and invite you to be part of that process.

We have big plans and exciting ideas for 2014! We want to grow the Change Maker community, mobilise youth to lead the campaign and inspire change at all levels. To do this better, we want to hear from you.

Come down on 5 April and amidst food, drinks and new friendships, share with us your ideas, experiences and hopes for change. Change Makers from different walks of life will be speaking about their stories of personal change and their experiences with community outreach. If you would like to share your story, write to us at [email protected].

We will also be honouring the Change Makers who have done exceptional work in 2013, so do come and support them!

We Can! is a community-led movement – it is your movement. You can have a say in the direction and impact the campaign creates this year. So come – lend us your voice, hands and feet.

Programme:

3-3.15pm – Registration

3.15-3.25 – Introduction

3.25-3.40pm – Icebreaker

3.40-4.10pm – Making waves in the community (discussion)

4.10-4.25pm – Outreach through social media

4.25-4.35pm – Opportunities for volunteering and activism

4.35-4.50pm – Presentation of Star Change Maker Awards

4.50-5.15pm – Sharing by Change Makers

5.15-5.30pm – Feedback and reflections

5.35-6pm – Tea and networking

–

*You are eligible to attend this reunion if you’ve attended a Change Maker workshop or taken the Change Maker Pledge.

Categories
Blog

We Can! Campaign Highlights 2013

we can logo (1)2013 marked the beginning of the We Can! End All Violence Against Women campaign in Singapore, and it was a fabulous year full of learning, adventures and change-making.

Our forum theatre, ‘Just A Bad Day‘ – put together and performed by Change Makers, using true stories from their own lives – travelled to audiences across the island, from youth at ITE colleges and *SCAPE, to communities at Tanjong Pagar Family Service Centre and Toa Payoh Community Centre. Through these interactive shows, we explored how violence isn’t always black and blue, and how each of us can play a role in putting a stop to the everyday manifestations of violence around us.

We also conducted 25 Change Maker workshops for almost 400 participants from different walks of life. At these workshops, we discuss why we as a society remain tolerant of violence against women and discover ways in which we can start to make change. The Change Maker workshop has proved to be a unique experience that shifts perspectives and encourages introspection. If you’ve come to a workshop and found it meaningful, do refer your friends to one here!

Would You Step In? Volunteer Change Makers staged a scene of a man abusing his girlfriend on Orchard Road to explore how bystanders would choose to intervene. Watch the video below!

We Can! Arts Fest on 8 December 2013 brought artists, activists and survivors together to start a dialogue about the less visible forms of violence in our society. 250 people attended, many of them taking the pledge to be Change Makers.

We look forward to making more memories with you this year, as we take the campaign forward. Thank you for being a part of the journey towards a non-violent and gender-equal society!

If you would like to explore bringing the Change Maker workshop or forum theatre to your community, write to us!

Categories
Blog

Blaze a trail this International Women’s Day

What makes you angry? What gives you hope? On International Women’s Day (8 March), join AWARE and the We Can! campaign at Hong Lim Park to explore these questions at All Fired Up! iwd-logo-1-1

This electrifying day of celebration will bring together people of all ages, genders and walks of life to share the struggles and successes of the women’s movement in Singapore.

Date: 8 March (Saturday)
Time: 4pm – 8pm
Location: Hong Lim Park
Click here to register!

Stand in solidarity with inspiring slogans and songs, or explore urgent social issues at booths set up by civil society groups. Go wild with our themed graffiti wall, and pass on the flame of hope at our candlelight vigil for the past, present and future of the women’s movement. Art, music, poetry and speeches: All Fired Up! has something for everyone.

Programme highlights:

Workshop: celebration toolkit  (4 – 5.30pm)                 feminist_fist

What’s a party without props? Join us for an afternoon of placard- and banner-making to set your message ablaze. We’ll work together to craft slogans and chants for the evening’s festivities.

Bellyful from EtiquetteSG (4 – 6pm)

Celebrate the fire in your belly! Artist and writer Dana Lam, with support from EtiquetteSG, will create plaster casts of bellies big and small of any age, colour and gender. We hope to have enough belly casts to cover the lawn for the candlelight vigil.

Women Blazing a Trail (5.30 – 7.30pm)

What makes you angry? What gives you hope? Women and their allies step up to answer these questions with honesty and verve, through speech and poetry – with slogans and chants to get everyone all fired up!

Some speaking slots are open. If you have a tale of anger and hope that you’d like to share, please contact Sumedha at [email protected] by 28 February.

Candlelight vigil for the women’s movement: past, present and future (7.30 – 8pm)  vigil

A show of unity to celebrate our past successes and get us geared up for the challenges of the future.  Old and young will stand together and share in the light of hope.

Please register for this event here. If you would like to set up a booth for your organisation at All Fired Up!, contact Sahar at [email protected].

Note: We welcome people of all nationalities to join us.  However, there may be legal limitations on participation for non-Singaporeans in some activities (e.g. slogans).  We apologise for these restrictions, which are not of our choosing.  Please do come and take part in everything else.

–
Canada imageThis event is kindly supported by the High Commission of Canada.

Categories
Blog

Supporting HPB’s initiative: Creating an inclusive and safe society for homosexual youths

by Ian Mak, Change Maker

[two_third]

stop-homophobiaMuch has been said about the Health Promotion Board’s decision to release an FAQ (frequently asked questions) about homosexuality, which was aimed at providing information for parents with homosexual children and address the issue of discrimination based on sexual orientation.

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) community in Singapore commended HPB’s move, labeling it an important first step towards helping homosexuals struggling with their sexual identity. Others, generally self-proclaimed ‘conservatives’, led by Pastor Lawrence Khong of Faith Community Baptist Church, were not so supportive. They claimed that the tone adopted by HPB was supportive of homosexuality in general and how it fundamentally damaged the moral fabric of society.

It is good to have such discourse and a wide spectrum of views. It shows that we are maturing as a society. However, the crux of the issue is for us to recognise that the LGBT community and in particular, homosexual youths, are not being accepted in our local communities. They are often discriminated in society and bear the brunt of much homophobia-fuelled violence.

Violence against homosexual youth is a result of the lack of sufficient education, information and inclusivity. From a young age, traditional norms of gender and sexuality are perpetuated via conservative sexuality education programmes in schools. Homosexuality is sneered at as an illegitimate lifestyle choice and a socially taboo topic. This creates an atmosphere of fear and judgment in schools, where homosexuals are afraid of being themselves. The failure of the education system to develop a culture of acceptance is reflected in the horrific gay bashing endured by Theo Chen, a 12-year-old student in SJI International Elementary School.

lgbt-rainbow-flag_100375401_mWorse still, families with deeply entrenched conservative values regard having homosexual children as a source of shame. It is commonplace to find openly homosexual children cut off from families who have rejected them based on their sexual orientation. Consider the case of Sham, who has been recently featured on the facebook page, ‘The People of Singapore’. A lesbian, she was forced to leave home at the age of 16. Her girlfriend has also been shunned by her family, who told Sham she should be gang raped to ‘fix her’. The experiences of Sham are very much indicative of a wider culture of intolerance and violence towards the LGBT community.

As a result, homosexual youths find it difficult to come to grips with their sexuality, and start to distrust themselves and their experiences. Bereft of support from friends, family and the government, they are often alienated and bear the brunt of violence from people influenced by homophobic rhetoric. Is it any wonder, then, that the Suicide Prevention Resource Centre estimates that between 30 to 40% of LGBT youth have attempted to take their own life?

By persisting with the status quo, we are refusing to acknowledge the discrimination and persecution that homosexual youths have to endure on a daily basis. Homophobia will continue to flourish and violence against homosexual youths will continue to be an everyday reality.

We need to tackle the root of the problem- the lack of education about homosexuality that prevents a culture of inclusivity from taking root. More than that, we need to ensure that families become more accepting towards homosexual youths, so that at the very they can cling onto their family members for support and guidance.

That is why HPB’s move to publish the FAQs about homosexuality is an important first step towards ending discrimination against homosexual youths. By developing and strengthening the support systems of homosexual youths, we are sending out a clear message that they are deeply treasured and respected members of an inclusive and accepting society. More than that, we are telling society- the lawmakers, the workers and the average joe on the street- that violence against homosexual youths can never be tolerated.

However, more needs to be done. More can be done. We have the ability, as a society, to come together to reject homophobia and violence against homosexual youths. If you are a young person in a school, be a friend to those who could be struggling with their sexual orientation. More importantly, do not tolerate any homophobic sentiment amongst your peers.

“The time time for justice, the time for freedom, the time for equality is always, is always right now!” – The Great Debaters

I am willing to play my part in stopping violence against LGBT youths. Are you?

Categories
News & Updates

Change Makers making a difference

Change Makers are the heart of the We Can! campaign, and over the last year, we have heard amazing stories from many of them about the change they have managed to effect in their own lives and the lives of others. These are some of them. Maybe these stories can give you ideas for how YOU can start to make change too!

Mark’s Change

mark

When some of his friends told him they had they had sexually assaulted a drunk girl one night, he was uncomfortable, but at that point, he didn’t feel able to say anything to them. Today, Mark plays the lead role in a play about date rape. Through this, he educates youth across Singapore that ‘no’ means ‘no’ and there are no excuses for sexual assault.


Jasmine’s Change

jasmine

When she and her colleagues experienced sexual harassment at work, she put her foot down. When she saw a man molesting a woman on the MRT, she got the attention of other commuters and told the man to get his hands off her. She runs a playschool and says that change has to start young.


Sam’s Change

sam

One of his close friends in school was badly bullied about her size. Sam regrets not standing up against the verbal abuse at the time, which he believes led to her developing serious eating disorders. Last year, Sam participated in a video that encourages bystanders to step in and stop verbal and physical abuse when they see it.


Kenneth’s Change

kenneth

He watched the video Sam was in – it’s called ‘Would You Step In?’. The very next day, he was on a bus, sitting behind a man who was forcibly kissing the woman he was with, despite her protests. After some hesitation, he tapped the man on the shoulder and told him “she looks uncomfortable”. The man backed off.


Rachel’s Change

rachel

She is a domestic violence survivor who went public with her story. She fights the stigma that victims face and reaches out to other women in abusive relationships. As an ambassador, she firmly believes that society must pay more attention to subtler forms of violence like psychological abuse.

 

 

Categories
Blog

What young people can do to stop violence against women

by Ian Mak, Change Maker

[two_third]

youth change makers“The youth of today and the youth of tomorrow will be accorded an almost unequal opportunity for great accomplishment and human service.” – Dr Nicholas Murray

 

It is often tempting as a young person to discount our power to make change. We tend to ignore daunting social problems, believing that we do not have the ability to do anything about it. “Anyway,” we think, “adults can do it better.”

 

Wrong. Youth have tremendous potential and more importantly, the unique opportunity to make a significant difference in forwarding social causes. In the days of our youth is when many of our beliefs and worldviews are solidified. If we take the effort to question and rethink the social norms and practices around us, especially where they are problematic, we will be able to make a significant breakthrough in advancing social progress. This is because, through a critical enquiry of the traditions and cultural attitudes we grow up in, we discover new ways of being and doing things that can be better for social living.

 

This is particularly true in the case of violence against women. Over the years, violence against women in societies around the world hasn’t reduced – in fact, it has increased. Violence against women isn’t about a random nutter of a husband abusing his wife. It’s about outmoded concepts of masculinity. It’s about the normalisation of men using violence against women to retain and reproduce power. It’s about the silence from friends and family members who ensure that such violence goes unreported, and, therefore, excused. It is, fundamentally, about the social tolerance of women’s suffering.

 

We can do better than that. Every generation has the power to shape its own beliefs. We can do this by interrogating the past and reimagining the future. To start with, we need to examine existing social norms that allow violence against women to occur and go unreported.

 

One idea that really needs to be reconsidered is the prevailing notion of masculinity. Through redefining masculinity, we can change the attitude of men towards women and towards each other. We must know, and let other men know, that to be masculine is not to be violent and dominant over women or other men.

 

Social progress is often only made when people come together to take a stand. Think of Martin Luther King’s civil rights movement and of Gandhi’s civil disobedience against the British monopoly of the salt trade. Youth in Singapore and across the world making a commitment not to tolerate violence against women would send out a powerful message to everyone. It would tell people that society is moving forward and that we, this generation, will not excuse violence, will not accept inequality and oppression.

 

It is not going to be easy. Familial constructs across the world designate men as the head of the household, allowing for men to be considered as superior and more powerful. On the flip side, the same familial constructs prescribe that women should be submissive, subordinate, sacrificial and silent in the face of violence because it is their responsibility to keep the family together at all costs. As a result, women find it difficult to report violence, for fear of stigma and societal condemnation.

 

The youth can play a significant role in reshaping gender relations, starting with our own attitudes and the relationships in our lives. We can also act as change makers on the ground by interrupting a friend who makes a sexist joke or gently pointing out to a couple that their relationship is unequal. Most importantly, for young men, we can collectively redefine our view of masculinity as one that does not condone violence against women.

 

These actions may be small individually, but if everyone makes an effort, we can make real progress towards ending violence against women.

[/two_third]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[one_third last=last]

youth change makers 2

 

 

 

 

 

change maker board

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

change maker board 2

[/one_third]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories
News & Updates

We Can! Arts Fest – Where Art Meets Activism

artsThis December, We Can! Singapore is breaking the silence of violence with the We Can! Arts Fest.

Violence isn’t always black and blue. Most times, it creeps into women’s lives unexpectedly – at home, at the workplace, on the street, at a party. It leaves an impact on women, men and children.

Do you know how to spot the signs?

Walk through our interactive installation on psychological abuse, stop to have coffee with a social activist, watch a play on true stories of violence from Singapore, and discover how you can make a difference.

On 8 December 2013, meet others who are using their voices to speak up against violence. Together, we can create awareness and action for a violence-free society.

Artists, activists and survivors are coming together in an exciting lineup to interrogate the different forms of violence around us that go unnoticed because of our silence.

Event details:
Theme: The Silence of Violence
Date: 8 December 2013
Time: 11am – 10pm
Venue: Aliwal Arts Centre, 28 Aliwal Street

Art + film + music + plays + poetry + workshops + more!

Get your tickets ($5) now!

Click HERE for more information on the programme.